Comments on the NZ Orchid Scene.

[MrCym]

A well-educated orchid friend who genuinely loves Odonts, asked me to make some comments on the NZ orchid scene. Now read my disclaimer, some of them are likely dead and I wish some who are still alive, had joined them. I may be talking about some who have gone where WT lines would be prominent and others are stalwart citizens (or were so) when I last interacted with them!

But why not start with "The Fat Slug" as he is known. Ross Tucker stands at the pinnacle of orchid worthlessness. He's rich as a tick (Mum's inheritance) yet he would be an extremely poor grower right across the orchid spectrum. His wife loves cats, based on physique, one might have expected more of a liking for heifers! He overcharges for everything and seems to be the source of tired re-clones for desperate enthusiasts. I cannot say he has ever cheated me on any plant but then we did no business. As a side-story, at the good old Geyserland Orchid days, we used to have a regular lunchtime visitor, one John Cairns, a butcher from Te Kuiti. Measly bastard, always ate our lunch but never so much as shared a pound of pork sausages. Anyway, we finally figured out he was the conduit to The Fat Slug and kept him appraised of what was happening at Geyserland. Just before I baled from NZ, of course we had moved to a lavish geothermal greenhouse at Horo Horo, just south of Rotorua. The ex had flown the coop and I literally drove off the property in July 2000 headed for AKL and the US. Just before I departed, literally the night before, I had thrown all the remaining large Cyms (tubs) into a lake we had on the property. They would rot quickly. My valued friend, Reg Durrant was passing by about noon on the day of my absconsion and he sees someone with a huge trailer, hauling plants out of the pond. He stopped, turned around and came upon none other than that worthless John Cairns. Picking up for The Fat Slug no doubt. Reg sent him packing and notified the local Police to keep an eye on the pr0perty until the ex figured the bird had flown.

His hybridizing was always pedestrian at best. He made a triploid Pacific Sparkle so of course it went nowhere. We made the 4n iteration and it continues as one of the leading pendulous lines in the entire world. I hope Tucker croaks with what we used to call "Fatty Degeneration" and for sure he will not be missed by serious orchidists anywhere! I'm starting slow but look for some spicier content coming up. Watch this space!

[cricketerry]

Well if that is starting slow I cant wait for you to speed up

[MrCym]

Terry, you always give me a chuckle. It will hot up soon but unfortunately one of the worst confessions involves what I was told by a female orchid judge in training who was molested by an old pervert! Best to get that one over with fast I think!

[MrCym]

Well one John Campbell from Leeston just outside of Christchurch was a strange one, right from the start. He had mediocre orchids, was heavily involved with the Christchurch Orchid Society (major black mark) and participated in orchid judging training programs. Now, my long and happily married friend need not fear ever having her confidence betrayed but that bastard Campbell molested her as part of her training! It was all I could do not smack the asshole in the face but when I was told, I was about to depart the NZ orchid scene so why get involved in legal expenses. I'm sure he's dead now but one of his closest South Island buddies was one, Ronald Maunder. Now Maunder was weird but I never had any evidence that he was a sexual pervert, however this is a super sashay into whacking Maunder and his miserable part in NZ orchids in an upcoming post!

[Gary S]

Well Andy, maybe NZ has more shonky orchid identities than here in Aus, that would be hard to beat.

Maybe you can shine a light on a few of the better identities as well to balance it out.

[royalarea]

I still can't believe the extent to which someone will go, to rake in from a lake drowned orchids, not to mention their surveillance and spies on you Andy in order to do this.

[MrCym]

I will deal with Maunder tomorrow evening and then get onto some nice memories!

[Gary S]

Have heard a bit about this guy, so will read with interest, but looking forward to the nice memories.

[MrCym]

Well Maunder was a real weirdo. I have to state that I never visited his nursey even though we were just 60 miles apart. He had an agency for some Pommie outfit, maybe Charlesworth or McBeans. His plants were always scrappy, poorly grown (underfed) and often afflicted with Mealie Bug. I was always unsure as to how he made a living.... finally I was told he had inherited land in a prime location and basically survived by selling off bits. He was a religious nutter, not JW crazy but close. I mention this because I have a very good friend from Rotorua who is a retired Presbyterian Minister. He introduced me to a charming young lady one day and added that her father grew orchids. I could tell nothing by looking at her and then she said she was Maunder's daughter, quickly adding that they saw religion very differently. Smart gal. Never met his wife etc, he was quite anti-social.

Maunder used to bludge his way around NZ giving orchid talks, you should note one of his special friends was the aforementioned John Campbell but I must confirm I have no evidence against RM in those matters. Anyway, we kept our distance. At Geyserland Orchids, we used to have an Open Saturday once a month with even greater emphasis as the World Orchid Conference approached in 1990. I was running around dealing with customers when suddenly someone drives a ute right up into my property and opens up the back to unload boxes.... I go over and it was Maunder. Get off my property was the greeting and he starts stammering that he has flasks to return to Ross Taylor from South Pacific Orchids who was due an hour later, in time for a catered lunch. Then you wait out on the roadside was my immediate response and I threw him out. In due course Ross arrived and loaded the flasks up and drove in. I made sure Maunder was sent packing without seeing an orchid or a sandwich!

So we're setting up the World Orchid Conference in September 1990. Clive Halls is slaving away on our display and I get paged by the staff. A very important call from Wellington??? Could it be the Prime Minister? I go into my office and speak with the Chief Ag Quarantine Officer. Clearly a man of authority and expertise. He outlines to me that Maunder has made some deal with a faceless Papuan to do an illegal plant exchange. Literally, the whole WOC was at very serious risk. He told me, you know I have the power to shut this whole event down! I told him I fully understood but that I could handle Maunder. All the Papuan plants were tagged with irremovable tags and Maunder was given a major dressing down. On my part, strong language may have been used. But the powers that be in Wellington were happy with strategy and Maunder would remain plantless as far as quarantinable material went! He never won any awards with his own stuff either!

Well, thanks to Clive we won all the major prizes at the WOC and 25% of the total medal count on plants grown at Geyserland. I decided right after the WOC to hang it up and concentrate on restoring my neglected orchid business. I still had one speaking engagement that predated the WOC and it was at the Henderson Orchid Society. I was all set up and then realized I needed a pointer which was in my briefcase. I rushed out in the darkening night just as Maunder pulled up next to my large V8, Ford Van. More on the van in future tales! I couldn't resist, so I slipped around and smacked Maunder right on the schnozz. He got quite a shock! I quickly went back inside and when he started bleating to people that I'd hit him, I asserted that he had run into my large side mirror.... The odd lie is useful.

From that point, Maunder ceased to exist for me. I used to see some tall geek that people told me was involved with Maunder who would appear at Waikato Orchid Society meeting with Maunder's and his plants. He was full of it, tried to argue with me about Miltonia spectabilis 'Moreliana' 4n. I pointed out to him that he was ignorant, that I had bought the first 4n at Rod McLellan's Sale's Room and then I took the plant to Tom Perlite as I had no NZ import permit for it. He made the fabulous Vuyls Mem. Mary Kavanaugh 4n with that pollen and then got me back selfings of the 4n spectabilis 'Moreliana' in flask. All that went over the Maunder sidekick's head and I'm sure he's long gone from orchids by now. For that matter, I suspect Maunder is probably long-gone from this earth but I couldn't care less. Tomorrow, a real orchidist from NZ!

[MrCym]

Well, I'm not sensing a great interest in this thread but let's talk about a genuine Cym enthusiast tonight. Alan Napper was a Pom and a wonderful friend. He, like a lot of other Hamiltonians worked at Ruakura, and Alan was talent scout for genuine twin calves.... among many other things. His territory was broad so he could be north of Auckland one day and outside Rotorua the next. Fortunately he could usually squeeze enough time for a cup of tea and a quick orchid tour when he was in the area. Alan and Jane became an item, Jane is super smart, another Pom who knows more about grasses than I know about Cymbidiums. Lo and behold, one afternoon, Alan asked if I would be Best Man at their wedding.... What an honor! I had never been Best Man before as my friends were well aware of my propensity for practical and even occasionally, impractical jokes. It was a splendid occasion, a lifetime memory.

Alan was a top grower. Never the crap culture of the Fat Slug, he had an arrangement with the Research Institute to rent some unused space and his plants really stood out. I used to make his potting bark and then shared our secret formula. His plants were in a class of their own at shows and he went through the training and became a CSA Judge. After a difficult time, darned if Jane didn't become pregnant and young William appeared. I watched him on US visits and ultimately of course at home in NZ. Alan made a group of thoughtful hybrids and gained some significant awards on plants from New Horizon. He had an eye for a good seedling. Another couple, Trevor and Pearl Marin are also Cym enthusiasts and they worked in very well with Alan's needs and plans. We used to kid him that he was Napper the Rapper as he preached the virtues of various plants and breeding lines. He was a fount of knowledge and an all around great orchidist and human being. Sadly, Alan had a heart episode on a cold morning when he was taking orchid trash to the dump just a couple of years ago and he could not be resuscitated. Actually not that bad a way to depart this mortal coil. Jane continues to putter with their Cyms and hopefully, William is too smart to become addicted.